These poems are ridiculously fun to write, but kind of hurt my head when I focus on them too much...its easier to just let it flow.
I hope that people reading this (if there are any) are enjoying it so far. I'd appreciate any feedback you have...whether you love the Gellybird or just plain despise Bergruntha (that horrific wench), please give your commentary!
Sincerely,
Charles Doyle
aka. InsanityBear
Monday, May 31, 2010
"Caruso The Steel Worker"
Caruso The Steel Worker suffers the most,
when his toes gets possessed by a dead game-show host,
his eyeballs explode as he tends to the roast,
then he lies on his back and admires the coast.
when his toes gets possessed by a dead game-show host,
his eyeballs explode as he tends to the roast,
then he lies on his back and admires the coast.
"Shabumba's Ballad"
Shabumba was a grande olde whale,
the grandest in the sea,
whose Gran had taught her all she knew,
of grandiosity.
"SHABUMBA!" drunken Goons would chant,
in pubs both far and wide,
"I'd maim my Wife and slay my Aunt,
to make that whale my bride!"
But if you knew The Lady Whale,
Shabumba, as do I,
You'd know that seeking sex from her,
would make your children cry.
the grandest in the sea,
whose Gran had taught her all she knew,
of grandiosity.
"SHABUMBA!" drunken Goons would chant,
in pubs both far and wide,
"I'd maim my Wife and slay my Aunt,
to make that whale my bride!"
But if you knew The Lady Whale,
Shabumba, as do I,
You'd know that seeking sex from her,
would make your children cry.
"Bergruntha & The Walrus"
Bergruntha met Jungleton Jacobs one day,
on a Walrus designed for a King,
its tusks were quite dusty,
Bergruntha was lusty,
The Walrus decided to sing:
"I hate you, Bergruntha, you crazy old broad,
and I thought Mister Jacobs should know,
your campaign in Poland,
to ban the name "Roland",
is fascistly-strange and Po-Mo."
"I'd never make love to a woman like that!"
mumbled Jacobs, dismounting the beast.
The Walrus had blown it,
Bergruntha disowned it,
and melted its blubber to grease.
on a Walrus designed for a King,
its tusks were quite dusty,
Bergruntha was lusty,
The Walrus decided to sing:
"I hate you, Bergruntha, you crazy old broad,
and I thought Mister Jacobs should know,
your campaign in Poland,
to ban the name "Roland",
is fascistly-strange and Po-Mo."
"I'd never make love to a woman like that!"
mumbled Jacobs, dismounting the beast.
The Walrus had blown it,
Bergruntha disowned it,
and melted its blubber to grease.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
"Relying On Benson"
Relying on Benson is never a grand
idea, because he'll demolish your hands,
as soon as he cuts you, you'll be needing band
-aids, but you can't help it, your blood turns to jam!
Is that how Young Benson would want to remember
his victims? As handless? Jam-blooded? Dismembered?
A goat had once stopped him from placing a blender
on top of his head as he questioned his gender.
So, whether a builder who's just put a fence in,
or priest who's forgiven a church full of dense sin,
remember as if there was only one lesson,
that nobody wins when Relying On Benson...
idea, because he'll demolish your hands,
as soon as he cuts you, you'll be needing band
-aids, but you can't help it, your blood turns to jam!
Is that how Young Benson would want to remember
his victims? As handless? Jam-blooded? Dismembered?
A goat had once stopped him from placing a blender
on top of his head as he questioned his gender.
So, whether a builder who's just put a fence in,
or priest who's forgiven a church full of dense sin,
remember as if there was only one lesson,
that nobody wins when Relying On Benson...
"Technology Swine"
Standing in Line! Minding the Time!
Drinking some paint with "Technology Swine"!
He'll spray you with bleach as he alters your spine!
Then FedEx your bones to The Land Before Time!
Drinking some paint with "Technology Swine"!
He'll spray you with bleach as he alters your spine!
Then FedEx your bones to The Land Before Time!
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